I think about you so much. Too much.
I used to be addicted to drugs.
The ones that make you feel high, but also low. The ones you take everywhere because you can’t go a minute without it. The ones that give you that guilt feeling in the morning.
The ones that make it almost impossible to sleep at night because it runs things through your head. The ones that you know you need to stop taking but somehow you just can’t. The ones that give you panic attacks at the thought of being without it.
The ones that take months, if not years, to quit the addiction and recover.
I used to be addicted to drugs. Not heroin, not cocaine, not LSD.
I was addicted to you.
*words not mine. If ever you know where it came from, please leave a comment. If you don’t, still leave a comment lol*
You used to tell me “I love you this big” because the size of your fist is the size of your heart.
We used to believe that we could happen, that we could hold each other close forever.
But life got in between.
Life got in between. And all i can think about of this fist is that you’re punching me, beating me up, hitting my heart, hurting and breaking me into pieces ’til i fall apart.
And its stupid cause we thought we can pretend we didnt break each others hearts, but we cant.
And im so tired of crying every night to sleep, tired of waking up crying again you would come back to me.
So maybe now i’ll try to accept everything. That no matter how I try to be worthy of you, I would still not be the girl you want.
No matter how hard I try to be better, it doesn’t mean you’ll love me back. No matter how I want you to need me, I wouldn’t be enough for you.
Every little detail of the memories I have of us together will always have a special space in my heart.
I guess moving on is the only thing left for me.
Moving on with my life without you, without the idea of us, without every thing that will remind me of you, and without depending my happiness on you. Lastly, just moving on and understanding that life goes on.
The world still goes round, and time passes by, and all of those other things shall go on with its purpose.
And so will I but this time, without you.
The most beautiful people you’ll ever meet aren’t always the ones who catch your eyes first.
The most beautiful are the ones that can never be figured out. The one you could talk with for many hours and still have a million things to ask. The people who have mind so lovely and special, you can’t help but fall in love with them.
*words not mine. if ever you know where it came from, pls leave a comment*
I’m gonna be posting my original works and gonna be sharing some of my favorite works from other artists with proper credits ofcourse
so I do not own everything I post in this blog.
Just wanna share bc I know you’ll like them too! So yeah!? :——)